Sunday, June 13, 2010

Where the energies and affections have gone

I haven't been writing much lately. Mostly because I have been busy with the people and things that need me most. Family, end of the year for lessons, laundry, ball games, end of the school year, piano conference, friends and more. I have a lot I'd like to write about. Mostly this has turned into sort of a journal about some highlights of our family life, which is great, but there's more than that.
I haven't told you that this year I said good-bye to three students who won't return next year. I haven't told you that it makes me sad to have them go. I know unique things about them that makes me love them. One is moving away and I can barely stand the thought; it makes me cry.
I haven't told you that Audrey is finished with elementary school and next year is 7th grade and she keeps saying only 6 more years until she graduates and I try to let it bounce off me because I'd cry if I thought about it.
I haven't told you that my sister's niece, Alex, graduated from high school. My mom, Jessica and me helped Beth and Winston have a graduation open house for Alex complete with cake balls. Alex will be going to UNI next year. She has made a couple of cheer squads so we'll probably be going to see a few games.
I haven't told you that Bill spent his entire Memorial Day weekend to build the stairs off our back deck for me.
I haven't told you that the music teachers association that I'm a part of held our annual state conference this past weekend at Iowa State University. I had a couple of roles- I was in charge of the vendors and door prizes for each session, I gave a talk at a breakfast meeting because I hold a vice president chair, and other jobs throughout the conference.
I certainly haven't told you that Bill took the kids to his parents' to give me some space to finish up all the details. Grandpa and Grandma's usually consist of riding motorcycles and 4-wheelers until you run out of gas or the sun goes down, swinging on a rope in the barn, making goodies with Grandma in the kitchen, riding or grooming horses, and general farm life. This time around, however, consisted of Ben being sick, extreme fatigue and finally a trip to the emergency room late at night and crawling in bed at 3:30 am.
I haven't told you that Bill and I had our 15th anniversary. We celebrated by going out for supper with Ben and Luke. We have yet to really celebrate and part of me is okay with that, part of me is not. But we didn't make it to 15 years by stopping the world until we celebrated something.
I haven't told you that Bill had a BIRTHDAY. That's all I'm not going to tell you. :)
I haven't told you that when I got home from my conference and Bill had been Superdad Extreme and Faithful Servant husband, I was completely selfish and did not give his weary bones a rest nor thank him one iota for all that he did for me and the kids. And while I did not tell you that, I must tell you that he forgave me, still loves me and we are good again.
I haven't told you that I want to tell you more. How I have seen God work in my life through many of these circumstances. I want to tell you. I hope to soon. But if I don't, then you'll know where my energies and affections have gone.


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